Domestic violence is often misunderstood. When we hear the words “domestic violence,” many of us picture physical violence between partners. But domestic violence is much broader than that. It can take many forms, and often, the signs are not immediately visible.

At Agape House, our outreach department spends a lot of time in the community talking about what domestic violence can look like and helping people recognize behaviours that may otherwise be overlooked.

At its core, domestic violence is about power and control. It can include physical, emotional, psychological, sexual, and financial abuse, as well as intimidation, threats, stalking, isolation, and controlling behaviours.

It might look like a partner constantly checking someone’s phone or location, deciding who they can spend time with, controlling their access to money, preventing them from working, repeatedly criticizing or humiliating them, or threatening to hurt them, their children, pets, or themselves.

“Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable, but it is the way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life… And make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary will take care of itself.” - William Martin (The Parent’s Tao Te Ching)

When we think of the Church year, we naturally gravitate toward the great seasons of Advent, Christmas, Lent, and Easter. These are the dramatic moments of anticipation, celebration, sacrifice, and resurrection. Yet the largest portion of the liturgical year is neither festive nor dramatic. It is known as Ordinary Time, and it may be the most overlooked gift in the Church calendar.

Our modern culture has conditioned us to think of the term “ordinary” as dull and something to be avoided. In our house, my parents did not tolerate the phrase ‘I’m bored’. There was always something to do. However, Ordinary Time is important. What would our world be if it wasn’t for the everyday faithfulness of God, His creation and the helpers around us?

Unlike Advent and Lent, which prepare us for specific celebrations, Ordinary Time focuses on the ongoing life of faith. It is a season not of dramatic spiritual highs but of patient growth. Nature offers a helpful comparison. A gardener may delight in the excitement of planting season and marvel at the beauty of harvest. However, most of the year is spent tending, watering, weeding, and waiting. Growth happens quietly. The most significant changes occur gradually beneath the surface. As William Martin says above, our children and grandchildren don’t need the pressure of being extraordinary, but a mentoring of being faithful with the ordinary.