COLUMN: Beyond the Shelter – Inside the role of counsellor advocates

When people think about a domestic violence shelter, they often picture crisis moments: a woman arriving with her children, bags packed in a hurry, safety as the immediate priority.

What’s less visible is the depth of work that happens beyond that first moment — the day-to-day support, advocacy, and relationship building that helps women begin rebuilding their lives.

In Issue 2 of Beyond the Shelter, we sat down with counsellor advocates Adidja and Sam to learn more about their roles.

One thing both counsellors emphasized is that there is no such thing as a “typical” day.

Adidja shared that what might surprise people most is just how different each day looks — and how limited resources can be in a rural community. A single shift might include counselling sessions, answering the crisis line, helping with childcare, supporting a client through advocacy appointments, or even helping someone move into new housing.

Sam echoed this, describing mornings that start with planning and quickly shift as new needs arise. Some days feel steady; others are a rollercoaster.

Despite the unpredictability, both counsellors spoke about small moments that stay with them long after the day ends.

For Adidja, it’s witnessing client “wins” — a woman securing safe housing, returning to school, or reaching goals she once thought were impossible. These milestones are reminders of the strength and resilience women carry, even after experiencing trauma.

Sam shared a quieter but equally powerful moment: watching women who are in the hardest season of their lives find connection within the shelter. Something as simple as cooking a meal together, sitting at the table, laughing, and building community can be deeply healing.

When asked what feels most meaningful about their work, both counsellors pointed to relationships.

Adidja spoke about seeing women rebuild from scratch — regaining confidence, rediscovering joy, and recognizing their own strength.

Sam highlighted the importance of being a safe person: someone clients can trust in one on one conversations while they navigate fear, uncertainty, and big life decisions.

Alongside these meaningful moments are real challenges. Both counsellors named housing as one of the biggest barriers clients face. Limited rental options, lack of references, poor or nonexistent credit, and the absence of a co signer can make finding safe, stable housing incredibly difficult.

Sam also noted the complexity of navigating multiple systems at once, where gaps in communication and systemic barriers can slow progress and add stress for clients who are already overwhelmed.

Behind the scenes, counsellor advocates are doing far more than crisis response. They walk alongside women from the moment they reach out, through shelter stays, and into life beyond. Their work is rooted in compassion, flexibility, and a deep belief in each client’s ability to heal and move forward — even when the path is not easy.

Lisa Fast is the outreach and housing coordinator for Agape House which provides a safe space and 24/7 support to those experiencing domestic violence in Southeastern Manitoba. The local crisis line can be reached at 204-346-0028.