New-born son, mother and grandfather defy the odds for three-peat birthday

The statistical odds of the same birthday occurring in the same family over three consecutive generations are about one in 133,000, according to the oddsmakers. That’s less likely than getting a hole in one (one in 5,000), an amateur bowler throwing a perfect game (one in 11,500), or finding a pearl in an oyster (one in 12,000).

But for the Wieler family of Kleefeld, the odds of a baby, in this case Abijah arriving when he did to his mother Joyce, who shares Abijah’s birthday and who also shares that same birthday with her father, were virtually a sure thing given just how many children bless their lives.

“We just about have to keep a red phone by the bed for my dad,” says Joyce, as she recounts how many placements through Child and Family Services (CFS) over the past 10 years she has fostered.

It’s children that brought Joyce and her husband, Augustine Ahishakiye, together in the first place. Joyce adopted her first child, Melina, after Melina’s mother passed away while she was in Joyce’s care. But in making that transition, Melina kept calling the name of a man she considered as her father; a man named Augustine.

As Joyce navigated the adoption process, Augustine began attending visitations regarding Melina where he met Joyce, and the two developed an instant bond over caring for children, particularly those in need. The two were married just over a year later.

The couple’s first biological child, Anaya arrived soon after that, who also shares a birthday just a few days later than Abijah’s, making June a very celebratory month for the family.

“We definitely would have never guessed to meet a husband through the CFS system,” said John as he watches Joyce cuddle Abijah. “That’s not exactly the dating place.”

“August has been amazing,” says Joyce about Abijah’s father. He grew up as an orphan and then in a group home in Burundi before escaping the Rwandan civil war to come to Winnipeg. “We have to be very careful not to show his face, as he still lives in danger because of the war,” cautions Joyce.

Joyce began her commitment to caring for children at an early age, working as a nanny to a family with special needs children when she was just 13 years old. Her patience and devotion became highly sought after when she showed a clear aptitude in caring for children with high needs and special challenges.

Many of those children remain in Joyce’s life today, even though she no longer works with CFS. Her devoted sister Ingrid, who thought she would not follow in Joyce’s parental footsteps to children in need, quickly changed her mind when she fell in love with one of Joyce’s emergency placements. Ingrid now cares for five children placed with her, in addition to being around Joyce’s always full house.

The potential for the family to expand again is also a safe bet as Augustine, after having fled the brutal civil war with his brother, discovered that his mother and several siblings had not perished during the genocide as previously believed.

“War broke out, and they just ran. He and his brother ended up at a refugee camp. His parents and sister never showed up so they assumed they were killed. Canada sent about 200 tickets to that refugee camp and he and his brother got placements in Winnipeg. Years later he asked the Canadian government, ‘Please see if you can find my parents,’ and they did,” says Joyce.

The couple hope to bring Augustine’s mother to Canada soon to meet the growing family, as she has not seen her sons since Augustine and his brother were five years old.

Grandfather John will be grateful for the help, as in addition to lending his birthday he also lends his support to both daughters and their expanding families. His work in house renovations and quality control ensures he has a key role to play in keeping all the children in comfortable conditions.

“They both need help sometimes, and so I just go where I am needed,” says John sitting beside his new “birthday crew,” ready to help with whatever is needed at the time.

Again, seemingly in defiance of the odds, the African connection to Joyce and Augustine showed up during Abijah’s birth at the HSC Winnipeg Women’s Hospital.

After 44 hours of labour for a baby that was expected much earlier, Joyce’s determination for a natural childbirth was sorely tested. However, a staffer at the hospital from Africa brought Joyce a “special” tea that brought her contractions to fruition and brought the triple birthday into reality.

“The good thing was there was actually an African woman there. I called her my Canadian mother-in-law because … in the dead of night, she got this idea that we use a certain hot tea to get the contractions stronger,” said Joyce. “Sure enough, it worked! The contractions came fast after that. She was a huge help.”

Joyce’s first childbirth required a caesarean section, and that procedure resulted in a long recovery time that the child-centric lifestyle the family practices just could not repeat. Insisting on a natural childbirth not only keeps Joyce in the busy child caring routine of the household but brought about the gift of the odds-defying generational birthday.

Culturally and spiritually, families that enjoy this triple birthday miracle are believed to share parallel karmic missions, and in the case of the Wieler-Ahishakiye family that mission seems to be caring for children in need, whether their own or somebody else’s, no matter where they are or where they come from.

“You can almost call this instead of a natural birth, a ‘community birth’ with all the people that have been helping out,” says Joyce holding Abijah and surrounded by her father and sister. Augustine looks on with a fatherly grin of approval.